Ask Isadora: The Magic Pill

The Magic Pill
* Why can’t the drug manufacturers find something that will work on women the way Viagra does on men? For that matter, does Viagra and the other pills like it ever work for women?
Viagra does seem to work for some women. The reason is that it sends blood to engorge the genitals. Where that creates an erection on men already feeling desire, for women it simply sends blood to the area which can feel like arousal to some women but doesn’t for most. Viagra and its like do not affect desire in men either, just the ability to have sexual intercourse. Since most women always have that ability (excluding painful conditions such as vaginismus), creating desire is what’s complicating the creation of a magic pill. For many more women than men the desire for sex is bound up in relationship issues and beliefs about appropriate behavior and there can be no magic pill to deal with those psychological factors.
* Is there any way to tell for sure whether your partner is lying to you?
For sure? No. There was a rumor that one could tell always when a certain politician was lying. It was whenever he moved his lips! In all other cases you have to rely on what you know of the person’s record of truth telling, certain body language cues on which many books have been written, and on what your own gut is telling you. Beyond that, your only recourse is private investigation.
* My daughter’s breasts are beginning to grow and they are coming in lopsided. Are the likely to even out when she is through maturing? She is 11, by the way. Isn’t that way early?
Young women are maturing much earlier these days than years ago. Average age for first menstruation in the 19th century used to be around 16; now it is 12. Better nutrition is one probable cause among many. If you will look carefully at your own body you will see that man or women, those things you have that come in pairs are not exactly equal. Some adults need differing shoe size for each foot. Some women need differing bra cups. If when she is an adult your daughter’s breasts are noticeably different and it bothers here, she can have them repaired.
*I would like all the information you can offer about herpes.  Thank you.
Two excellent online sources for everything you might want to know and even some answers to which you haven’t yet thought up the question is the American Social Health Association ( and Antopia’s For those who prefer their information gathering in hard print here are the basics: Herpes is a virus, more than one actually, that once contracted lives in the body forever. Some people can harbor it without ever having any outbreaks but most people show periodic flair-ups with a noticeable painful sore that lasts for about a week. If it’s on the lips it’s commonly called a cold sore. It is important to know that herpes is always communicable; more so when there is a sore, but even when there is none. So know whether you carry the virus and can transmit it through intimate contact. A blood test can tell you whether or not you do.