Ask Isadora #48-08 : Ready, Willing and Able

* I am a 68 year old single woman. I had a brief sexual adventure about two years ago. I’m hoping there will be others but I can’t count on it. What can I do to keep my vagina in shape? I want to be ready if the Universe provides another opportunity.

Good for you! I trust you’re a former Girl Scout (“Be prepared”) First, when you put hand or body lotion on your skin put some on the folds of your inner labia as well. You don’t have to use a specigic lubricant for the vagina. Something basic like Eucerin is just fine for that tender tissue, not something with heavy scent. Then, don’t forget your Kegel exercises, squeezing the muscles that stop and start the urine flow. Lastly, give your self regular orgasms, even if you’re not in the mood. Think of it as a maintainance tune-up to keep everything in working order.

* My boyfriend came home from work, took off his business clothes to take a shower, and left his underwear on the floor. When I picked it up I noticed some sticky liquid in the crotch. What do you think that means?

That your boyfriend is a slob? That you are far too accommodating in picking up after him? Oh, you mean the sticky stuff. It might have been ejaculate but that would probably have been dried up rather than sticky. Not too many adult men regularly come in their pants during the day, but who knows what kind of day he had. So what you saw was probably not urine or ejaculate. I’d guess pre-cum which some men secrete copiously when aroused. During the day something excited him. Let us choose to believe that it was thoughts of you.

* I am a 43 year old man, married to my second wife. I had a vasectomy when I was married the first time and now my wife says she’d like to have a child. Before I dash her hopes is there a way I can find out if that’s possible?

I’m hoping you told your present wife that you had a vasectomy before you married her. As someone who has dedicated her professional life to clean and clear communications I would sure hate to think otherwise. In any case, a visit to a urologist would enable you to discuss the possibility of reversing your vasectomy. Since some vas deferens do grow back together on their own, there is a also a possibility that you are still producing enough live sperm to accomplish the task should you want to through assisted reproductive techniques such as Also, coming on the market very soon is a product like a home pregnancy test called SpermCheck Vasectomy, It was developed to test for viable sperm after vasectomies. Traditionally, the process has involved bringing semen samples to a physician’s office or laboratory at two- and three-month intervals after the procedure. According to the World Health Organization Manual on Semen Analysis, normal sperm counts range from 20,000,000/ml to as high as 200,000,000/ml. When the count is below 1,000,000/ml, there is only a remote chance of achieving pregnancy without assisted reproductive techniques. The National Institutes of Health reports that one in six men over age 35 have had a vasectomy.