All posts by AskIsadora

Vanilla Sex

Vanilla sex—or “just” vanilla sex? “Vanilla sex” is slang for sex that is plain, or traditional, or unimaginative–not “kinky.” It generally doesn’t involve role-playing, games like BDSM, risk-taking like exhibitionism, or unusual locations. Most people don’t use “vanilla sex” as a neutral term; the implied term is frequently “just vanilla sex.” I beg to differ. … Continue reading Vanilla Sex

Conversations With Yourself: Put-downs or Pats on the Back

What do you call yourself when you talk to yourself?  Some people don’t think they do talk to themselves but everybody does.  I call myself “Kiddo” although I haven’t been anything like a kid in far more than half a century.  Somehow it sounds somewhat affectionate to me, and encouraging, exactly the tone I would … Continue reading Conversations With Yourself: Put-downs or Pats on the Back

What People Keep Asking Me About Sex and Relationships

What People Keep Asking Me About Sex and Relationships is the title of my newly published collection of essays*.  It’s also a frequent question in itself : what do people ask you about when they write to you?  What are young people/women/married folks etc. curious about? Usually they refer to all the mail I received … Continue reading What People Keep Asking Me About Sex and Relationships