* I’ve heard that after many years of sexual intercourse and maybe some childbirth, a woman’s vagina will stretch and become too large for her partner. After some time without, I am again sexually active but my vagina seems to have shrunk. Is that possible? I used to enjoy intercourse but now it’s painful. What’s changed?

Obviously, you have. It’s always a good idea to have a gynecological checkup after a long period of celibacy just to make sure everything is in working order. There are vaginal disorders you might have that will be activated by renewed intercourse, like a yeast overgrowth or urinary tract infection. You don’t say how old you are, but perimenopausal (before, during and after menopause) women often dry out, lose the ability to lubricate as much, and the vaginal lining thins. Another reason to allow your gyn to check you out and perhaps prescribe a lubricant or some estrogen cream. And whatever your age, the rules of safe sex still apply.

* I’m a guy who has been through a painful divorce and several unpleasant relationship false starts. I’m wondering if relationships are worth it. What do you think?

Obviously I wouldn’t have devoted my long professional career and considerably more years of personal “research” to intimate relationships if I didn’t think they were worth pursuing. If you’re feeling battered by the relationship wars, however, it’s a good idea to take some time out. Take a look at the type of person you’re attracted to and your expectations. See if you can be more specific about what usually goes wrong so you can make some changes in your choices or your approach or your timing or in whatever it is that keeps things from going where you would like them to go. Remember the words of that brilliant philosopher Woody Allen who has said “Relationships are like chickens. They are dirty and messy….but we need the eggs.”

* I am a single professional woman who just bought and moved into a condo of my own. The owner of the next condo in this six unit complex is an attractive single man who I notice noticing me. There are very good reasons not to date someone you have to work with every day. Do you think they apply to someone you live next to? After all, the boy next door is a fabled good catch.

The reasons not to date a co-worker have to do with potential abuse of power and workplace favoritism. Those don’t apply in a living situation. What is similar is that should the relationship sour there you jolly well are, facing the embarrassment daily. To me, that would be worse in a living situation than a work one. In the first exciting heat of a new attraction no one thinks of the possible negative outcome but you know it exists. Do you want to take the chance? It’s a lot easier to change positions within a company or jobs themselves than it is to sell a home.

* I am a high school girl. I want to know why do some people have sex with a person they just met for the first time.

Attraction is attraction. Some people are not bothered by any sense of immorality about this. It’s a personal decision for those who are mature enough to make good decisions.

` *Are there woman who enjoy sex as much as men do?

There are women who enjoy sex much more than some men do!