* Im planning for a wild weekend and don’t want to worry about having erection difficulties. I generally take Cialis. How much is safe for say, a 48 hour funfest?

A note in the March 26, 2008 Sexual Science, the newsletter for the Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality, says that Eli Lilly & Co., the makers of Cialis, have received approval from the USFDS for daily use. When it’s taken that way a man “can attempt sexual activity any time between doses.” It doesn’t say he’ll succeed (!) but I am assuming that it means it will stay in his system for continuous effective usage. (Http://www.cialis.com/index.jsp)

* I moved across the country to live with my boyfriend. It’s still a new relationship and the chemistry’s still there. He’s HIV+, I’m HIV-, and would like to stay that way. We’re mutually monogamous, and trust each other, so initially, I (the top) barebacked him (the bottom), knowing it’s a small risk to me (even though we were both well lubed). So, soon after I thought to myself it’s not worth even a small risk, talked with him about it and started using condoms. He was fine with that, as he wants me to stay healthy. Though soon after (the 2nd week or so after my arrival) he became less interested in sex with me. He’s still affectionate with me, just not having quite as high a libido. He’s working with an a-hole of a boss and trying to find work elsewhere while helping me look for work. I asked him about his decline in libido and he said it’s a side effect of being positive; that, before it, he was just fine, but since being positive, he his libido kind of comes and goes, almost like a cycle. He doesn’t like to talk about it and I try not to make him uncomfortable about it even more. Do you know of any medical evidence to back this up? I don’t want to sound paranoid, I just never heard of this possibility before.

Everyone’s libido tends to have peaks and valleys. The recent move, his job problems, his HIV status, the re-introduction of condom use, all may have something to do with this temporary ebb in his desire. Don’t make too big a deal of it. Just see what happens as things smooth out. If there is a support group around for mixed HIV status partners where you live please seek it out. A lot of the questions, and answers, you two have can be shared with others in the same arrangement.

* My girlfreind tells me when she intends to have sex during her period she puts in her diaphragm and it acts like a plug, holding back the blood flow less intrusively than a tampon (which might get knocked into who knows where). Is that safe?

Yes. I did it myself for years. It can’t be depended upon for birth control at this time, however, and yes, birth control is still recommended during a woman’s period. So if she uses some other form of birth control (if that’s necessary), like a condom or the pill, and she removes it every few hours to empty the blood and wash it out, it’s perfectly safe. I have to tell you a horror story here. A friend of mine did this year’s ago. Removed the diaphragm and laid it on a towel by the bedside after sex. In the morning when she was going to reinsert it she found that her cat, attracted by the smell of blood, had eaten the whole inner dome, leaving only the outer rim. All together now: Ewwwwwww.