* On a trip to Washington, D.C., my boyfriend asked me to give him head. Usually I am happy to do that whenever he wants. I refused because I thought it was dangerous to do while he was driving. I wouldn’t give him a hand job either. He got really mad. Was I wrong? What should I have done?

Exactly what you did do – refuse, or take a Greyhound bus to the capital. I’m in favor of blow jobs and hand jobs too, but I am really down on people who put everyone else on the road in danger for a few seconds of excitement. If it’s that urgent, pull off the road and take care of it. Otherwise, promise him something very thrilling when you arrive as a reward for getting you there safely. If he insists on entertainment on the trip home, try stimulating conversation or Books On Tape.

* You seem to know a lot. Which pills are best for increasing the size of the penis? I see a lot advertised. And is there anything to increase the amount of cum?

I do know a lot…comparatively. I know not to believe the ads in the back of comic books. The most effective way of increasing the size of your penis is a sexy partner or a hot fantasy. The more aroused you get the bigger and harder your erection will be. And that’s it. No pills, potions or lotions can improve upon nature. The same is true with cum volumes. If you drink lots of liquid, refrain from ejaculating for much longer than you usually do, and when having sex stop and back off a time or two before you let go, you will increase your normal volume of ejaculate. Everything has its limits, however, so don’t expect miracles.

* How do I get my husband to be more verbally expressive when we’re making love? I am very verbal. I make sure that he knows what he’s doing feels great. He’s been this way since I met him eight years ago. I thought by now he would become more verbal since I am with him. Please help.

Two huge myths here that cause no end of trouble between lovers. One is “because I do it, feel it, or think it, you should too.” The other is even more misery-making: “once we’re married things will change.” Have you told your husband in so many words that (1) you’d like to know exactly what kind of touch pleases him and (2) it would excite you to hear more expressive noises during sex? They are not the same things and maybe one would be easier for him to do than the other. He can learn to be more verbally expressive if he practices when he masturbates. Even “mmmmm, yes” is a good beginning IF he wants to begin. If not, he is who he is. An attentive lover can usually tell when s/he is doing something right. Note his body language. Does he move toward or away from a particular caress? What happens to his breathing when you do a specific thing? Does he move his body or yours into a position that suggests wanting a certain kind of touch? (Remember those highschool Romeos who used to try to shove your head down into their lap? That’s direct communication without sound.) There are ways for him to communicate both his wants and his pleasure. Talk about it out of bed. Verbal interchanges about sex are often easier there. They are easier in the third person too, so show him this column.