Intimacy.  This word is often used as a synonym for sex. As most of us know, sex and intimacy aren’t the same.  We are intimate with family members or dear friends, but that relationship isn’t sexual.  Sex in a loveless marriage or out of duty lacks intimacy.  What I will discuss here is that special … Continue reading Making Time for Intimacy →

There are couples who have frequent highly emotional fights followed by passionate love making. One sees them in Italian, Spanish and Mexican movies.  You know, “those hot blooded Latins”.  These couples, however, are by no means the majority.  What is far more common is that when one person is angry with her or his mate … Continue reading What Anger Does To Desire →

What do you call yourself when you talk to yourself?  Some people don’t think they do talk to themselves but everybody does.  I call myself “Kiddo” although I haven’t been anything like a kid in far more than half a century.  Somehow it sounds somewhat affectionate to me, and encouraging, exactly the tone I would … Continue reading Conversations With Yourself: Put-downs or Pats on the Back →

What People Keep Asking Me About Sex and Relationships is the title of my newly published collection of essays*.  It’s also a frequent question in itself : what do people ask you about when they write to you?  What are young people/women/married folks etc. curious about? Usually they refer to all the mail I received … Continue reading What People Keep Asking Me About Sex and Relationships →